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Monday, 11 April 2011

i feel like such a pile of shit

i will never amount to anything

here's to a life of mediocrity and just getting by

Wednesday, 29 December 2010

this happens every time you visit.

leave me to hang out with her, then whenever were together, you tell me how muh you hate being with her.

im pretty sure its a good thing you moved away, because i dont think we'd be friends if you were still here. it breaks my heart every time you do this, probably because im still hung up on our 3rd grade memories, and how i could trust you with everything. i honestly know nohing about your life now.

i hate getting walked on. i hate not standing up for myself. i hate that i keep letting this happen. and i really hate that this doesnt phase you.

well it was good seeing you 1 day out of the year. cool.

Monday, 06 December 2010

for the good ol dayssssss

Where is your Mother? sleeeeepin

Where is your Father? sleeeeeeeeepin

Do you like to swim? im not very good, i have a tendency to slowly drown

Do you need to return anyones phone call? i think im good

Where were you born? staten island

Where do you keep your birth certificate? attic someplace

How many days until your birthday? 6 months, 13 days

What is the closest orange object to you? the asian girl sitting next to me id card holder

Have you sneezed in the past hour? actually no

How many books are in your room? too many

What did you last eat? brownie!

Who is your favorite teacher of all time? schteve!

Name one of your goals for this year? have the best night every night, get on top of my work

What is the biggest trouble you have ever been in? oh god

Did you cry because Michael Jackson died? no

What does your 9th message on your phone say? my phone doesnt work like thattt

Look to your left. What's there? an azn

Ever pop someone else's pimple? .....no

How long does it take you to fall asleep? so long

Are you scared about the end of the world? yes i am

Is there a TV in the room you are in? nope

What are you looking forward to? end of the semester <3

What comes to your mind when I say red? firetruck

What other language do you want to be fluent in? french plz

Do you crack your neck often? all day baby

Do you usually hold your pee for a long time? mhmmm

Is it possible to lick your elbow? not me personally, but ive seen it

Worst feeling in the world? being let down

What's your current favorite commercial? choclate commercials that are overly sensual

Name something you think is pointless? writing papers

Favorite fast food restaurant? sonic!

Have you ever been in a fist fight? no, never

Would you concider yourself as a pyro? nope

Did you have a weird dream last night? i cant remember!

Do you wish at 11:11? not usuallllly
hello there.

in a weekend of craziness, the parties, the laughs, the best time i've had in a while... i still find time to make myself miserable. i hate finding out about that past of yours, because it seems like a lie. you seem like a stranger. and i know i cant hold that against you, because i mean thats just not fair.

but it still hurts, and im dumb. and thats how problems start.

i hate myself for even putting this on the internet. now the entire world can see how my life is a giant joke with some cheesy obnoxious punchline.

also, tumblr angers me greatly.

Wednesday, 20 October 2010

on the verge of declaring a major. yay cara :)

aephi life is gooooooooood, im so happy and i love the sorority and yayaya life is so goodddddd. lea is my savior, although i havent seen much of her. i feel we arent as close (shes toooo busy), but i know were still the closest out of my pledge class big/littles, so im okay :)

ive been super busy w school shit, im actually procrastinating as we speak! yay.

off to do work.

Saturday, 07 August 2010

i hating facebook so bad right now.

and i know if i address this issue, ill come off as needy, or whatever. but wow thats a stab in the back right there.

Friday, 06 August 2010

gr

summer had been interesting. work work work. rarely going out. going to bed at 11. why is my life retarded.

ive been feeling anxious about going to school. good&bad kinda anxious. im so scared about aephi shit. i dont fit in with my pledge sisters, or theyve been ignoring me. idk its strange.. like ill post something on their wall & never get a responce back. thats the reason for my last post. i need to change because i dont like who i am, im kinda sucky tbh. im surprised i have the small handful of people that actually are interested in my life/well being/etc.

ive also been beating myself apart for the same thing i have been for oh a year and a half. like that will ever go away lol.

uncle & great uncle are dealing with the c word. yupp. now im paranoid its hereditary. like thats helping anything.

i just want to be rich. that would fix my problems. thats stupid of me to think, i know. but if i was rich, i wouldnt have to work 4 days a week 9-6, i could pay for school, no loans, no stress, NO GUILT of going to school. more money for cute clothes, which would make me happier.

yupp. this is my lifeee.

Saturday, 17 July 2010

Still not over this. It is impossible.

I would so like to just be different then who I am, because I'm coming to the conclusion I suck.

Sorry the first the time I update this is an absolutely miserable entry, but this feeling is becoming dangerously close to seeping out into real life. Grr

Monday, 17 May 2010

well,

kate moved out.. the room is so empty and sad looking.

i had the BEST year with these girls, and i honestly dont think ill have roommates like them ever again. our situation was so perfect, it was destined to happen, i believe. all the shit that couldve happened that couldve prevented us from ever meeting. STRANGE.

freshman year, you were way too good to me...

Tuesday, 11 May 2010

hello xangaaa

its been a while. :] well my first year of college is coming to a close, after all this time. although i kinda feel like it flew by...
last day of classes was nice, my 3 hour class was canceled so that was a huge plus haha
hosting tonight with the phinest <333 then a 7 am class trip, ill be a trooper tonighttt brahhh. ;D hahaha

things are going swell, maybe ill write more in this later. as of late, it seems more like a hassle than anything, but i still like you xanga. :]

Saturday, 24 April 2010

I am

So sick of this guilt...

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

well im done.

i was initiated on saturday :]

im so happy, i feel so complete. i love my letters, i love my AMs & and am just in love with ΦΦ <3 my first night out was... amazing haha a blur, mostly. but a pretty fantastic blurrr.

i love my girls <3 sosososo happy.

--------------------

JAMES CASTORO IS THE MOST AMAZING PERSON EVER.
<33333333333

I love him so very much, and he has improved my life by a jillonfold. i coul not ask for anything more i the world, im legitimately the happiest ive ever been.

Monday, 12 April 2010

still alive! aw wasnt bad at all...

almost done.. so proud of myself...

if anyone else is proud, feel free to buy me something. :) like people read this anymore..

http://somethinggreek.com/shop/

Saturday, 10 April 2010

A.W.

anyone wanna help me kill myself?

thx <3

Thursday, 01 April 2010

well that happiness ended rather quickly.

back to school. back to stress. have to write a 4 page paper and french HW. its 1 am. tomorrow i have to miss lib hours for a bit to do things. i really need them. of course when i need lib hours i cant go.

looked at my midterm grades, and i wanna shoot myself. ive never done this badly.

i feel like a disappointment to everyone. i feel like the decisions i made should have been done with others in mind. but i was selfish. i dont regret it, i just wish things were different.